
This week is the usual whole lot of summer nothin', with the exception of Soul Calibur IV. Since many folks might not know a Soul Calibur from a Soul Reaver or a Soul Nomad, I've assembled the relevant bullet points to help you decide whether it constitutes a threat to your wallet:
* Very friendly to button mashers. You don't have to know what's going on to make it look like you know what's going on.
* Breast physics not quite as ridiculous as DOA, but more ridiculous than Virtua Fighter.
* Notable characters you might remember from previous Soul Caliburs include the pirate Cervantes (not to be confused with the author of Don Quixote), Voldo and his crotch, former Swiss Miss model Sophitia, Yoshimitsu (who still hasn't noticed that someone stuck a sign on his back that probably reads "KO me!" in Japanese), and the chainsword-swinging Ivy whose posterior you might recognize in the picture above.
* Includes guest characters from Star Wars. The Playstation 3 version gets Darth Vader (black, sinister, Imperial), the Xbox 360 version gets Yoda (smart, nimble, slightly ridiculous), and both versions get the Apprentice from Force Unleashed (who?).
* Along with Virtual Virtua Fighter and Taken Tekken, Soul Caliber Calibur continues the tradition of fighting games not playing well with spell checkers.
If these bullet points do nothing for you, consider this week's wallet threat level a bright pulsing green.
gumbyrox:
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