It's surprising Haze ended up the way it did: really bad and on the shelves. There are rumors Ubisoft recently scrapped the next Splinter Cell game, which was supposed to take a page from Assassin's Creed's crowd dynamics. But presumably it just wasn't good enough, so they threw it out and went back to the drawing board. Publishers should do that with more games. Games such as Haze.

There were warning signs along the way, mainly in the form of delays. The spin was that publisher Ubisoft and developer Free Radical wanted more time to make it that much better. Ha ha. That's not the way it usually works. Delays almost always mean problems. For a great example of pre-release bravado, watch Free Radical's Rob Yescombe shilling himself hoarse. And for a cringe-worthy example of how shamelessly Ubisoft will roll out a Fragdoll, watch this age-gated "comedy" sketch. Warning: it's ten minutes of your life you'll never get back.

It's also peculiar that a year before its release, Haze magically became a Playstation 3 exclusive. What happened there? All that time developing for the 360 and PC tossed out the window? Sony rubbing their hands with glee and cackling 'Mine! All mine!'? For this thing?

There's a review after the jump if you want the gory details. Here's a teaser: it opens with the words, "Haze is one of the worst shooters I've played in a long time".

Haze is one of the worst shooters I've played in a long time. It's on par with Eastern European budget-rate shooters, or Chrome, or Devastation (if neither of those names means anything to you, count yourself lucky). Haze is even enough to make me fondly recall Perfect Dark Zero, a hyped underwhelming launch title for the Xbox 360. It's even worse than the wretched Blacksite: Area 51.

All you're doing in Haze is a bunch of typical "Get to da choppa!" stuff. There is no sign of the free-wheeling trope-skipping developer Free Radical did in their superlative Timesplitters games, which combined clever humor, varied gameplay, and an infectious enthusiasm. Those games hurtled joyously forward with the promise of something new and unexpected after every level. One moment you were bashing in the heads of zombies, the next you were a superspy sniping Communists, the next you were storming a fortress during World War I while battleships bombarded the walls, and the next you were shooting down UFOs and battling weird aliens.

But in Haze, one moment you're playing a tired Halo clone, built with what looks like last-gen tech, and the next you're still playing a tired Halo clone, built with what looks like last-gen tech. There's very little here that doesn't look like it would work in a Playstation 2. Take, for instance, the bobsledding sequences. Actually, they're supposed to be driving sequences, but the way you're shunted down narrow canyons recalls bobsledding. That you tend to do them with South American rebels shouting plucky things like 'Never geeve up!' makes this its own version of Cool Runnings.

There are a few rare moments with big levels. But every time Haze tries for some sort of next-gen spectacle, it falls as flat as a cardboard facade. There's one point where you get in a cable car to go to a mountaintop observatory. The ensuing attempt at "scenery" is painful. Oh, Haze, no. Just no.

The core concept – that the government hires a corporation to supply drugged and oblivious mercenaries to do its dirty work – is interesting. The drug, called nectar, prevents soldiers from seeing blood or bodies, and it even gives weapons a pleasant rat-a-tat sound effect. Early on, there's a great twist as your nectar wears off and you start to see the world As It Really Is (well, as it plays in a rote shooter, at any rate). The turning point is a wonderfully eerie and confused instance of wading through a moral and literal swamp.

But then you're gunning for the poor misunderstood aggrieved rebels for the next six hours or so. Nothing else interesting happens. No new gameplay twists, or weapons, or aliens, or even zombies. The final level, which involves chasing down and boarding a combination aircraft carrier/souped-up sandcrawler, could have been really cool. It's not. Haze goes nowhere. Even the politically heavy-handed Area 51 knew enough to throw in a giant octopus from time to time.

All the wonderful content from the Timesplitters games is completely missing. There are no interesting multiplayer modes, or unlockables, or challenges, and not a single moment as delightfully goofy as the absurd "Let's split" tag line. What happened to Free Radical? They used to be awesome. I guess years of pouring tons upon tons of content into a single title and not meeting much success finally got to them. So now they're finally going to not to meet much success with a game that deserves it.